Getting past the rough times

So I decided to start this blog because I am seriously contemplating becoming a writer. I love everything about writing. It has always been my easiest way of getting my point across. I don't think that what I say is any better than anyone else, I just want a platform to write everything that is going on in my head. Who knows, maybe it will help someone else..

For awhile I was in a rough spot in my life. I had become severely depressed and no one really knew why. I had had a series of bad relationships and kept letting myself fall deeper into a hole. After three years of messing with medicines and one crazy hospitalization (this is a total side note, and I don't mean to make a joke, but if you have ever seen the movie it's kind of a funny story then you know what a psych ward is like), I knew there was something way beyond just being depressed. The sad feelings would get better for a time, but then I would hit a stage where everything seemed perfect and like nothing was wrong. Finally being able to advocate for myself took awhile, it wasn't until after I was hospitalized and the psychiatrist wanted to increase my medication instead of taking a different approach that I started standing up for myself.

Being an adult and not knowing what is wrong with you is one of the hardest things to deal with in the world. It's harder than admitting something is wrong in the first place. Finally getting help does actually start making things better. I have finally been diagnosed bi-polar and am finally getting back to a normal life. It's not easy, but it's easier. I can finally tell my doctor, psychiatrist, and therapist what is going on and advocate for myself. I have never been one to put a label on an illness or disorder, but sometimes that is needed. Having been labeled bi-polar has enabled me to actually get help and get better.

I can finally cope with things and live a "normal" (whatever that is) life. This may be one of the only serious blogs I write, but I think someone out there might need to hear it. Bottom line is this: if you feel something is wrong, get help. Admit there are problems and find someone you trust. Building up the walls and hiding from everything just makes it harder. And there are other people out there who have been down the same road as you. Pulling yourself out of the bottom of the hole is so hard, but when you finally do, it is the greatest feeling ever. Rejoice in your strengths and all the small steps you take, because in the end those small steps are the largest.